Leila Shea Christensen

Sometimes my family surprises me. Well, “surprises” is probably not quite the right word. I know them, after all, and nothing that comes out of their mouth is that unexpected. Some days those phrases are lucky enough to turn into entire blog posts… other days, I write them down and save them for later. For example:

• “What are those, pigs?” – Mom, the country girl. Not. We were driving past a field with a lot of GOATS in it when she asked the question. Granted, Mom was driving. But how do you get PIGS confused with GOATS?
• “I see all the cow faces and it reminds me of Barry.” – Jessie (19), the REAL country girl, aka NOT Mom. Jessie works at a dairy (where she sees cow faces) and Barry is her boyfriend. Barry’s on a two-year mission in Fresno, California. Maybe he should be worried if Jessie’s reminded of him when she sees COWS. PS – Barry is not nickname-protected because Jessie has his real name on her own blog. Plus I don’t know what nickname we would use for him. “Jessie’s COWboy” would maybe work, given that she sees cow faces and thinks of him.
• “You are not even CLOSE to a cow.” – Reece (16), the king of compliments. You know him as the Cowboy Casanova, but he can have more than one title. I was trying to figure out how much our cows weighed… when I said 125 (which is what I weigh) he informed me of the above “fact.” Oh – and at the time I said that, our cows weighed probably 300-350 lbs. Maybe 400 lbs.  Maybe I have a misconception about how 125 lbs looks. (And maybe Jessie should take a cue from Reece so that Barry doesn’t cry when he realizes that Jessie thinks of him when she sees cow faces.)
• “When you turn 25, then you’ll be an antique!” – Samantha (11), commenting on my upcoming birthday in August. I wonder what that makes Dad (who hit the big 5-0 last October).  How do you get better- or older-  than “antique”?
• “Dad, when you’re too old to remember, I’m going to sell the house and buy an RV. Then I’m going to take you all sorts of places.” – Cassie (almost 10), when talking about her “assignment” as the youngest child. That assignment? She’s taking care of them in their old age. We all voted, and she got the job. Maybe Dad should rethink that one. Unless he wants to go all sorts of places.

Can you see why I’m always laughing? Oh. Maybe you didn’t realize I’m always laughing. Trust me, it’s hard to stop with a family as fun as mine. I totally love them. And I’ve gotta admit – it’s a real relief to know that I’m nothing close to a cow, even if I’m going to be an antique soon.